Recomendations from KingPut

The best game reviews come from gamers who know you well. Here's what KingPut has to say about games from 2007.

Note: KingPut is the organizer of a successful open family game night, and my personal expert on games that appeal to children, families and casual gamers, but don't make you want to bang your head against the table to relive the boredom.

KingPut says...

With the holidays coming up I've made the following list of newer games I've played this year. Most of the newer euro type games I've played over the last year have been crappy to barely tolerable. I wouldn't recommend buying any of them. I'd have Francie and you try Thebes and Zooloretto. They might be good purchases for her. They're in my Francie type games that Uba would tolerate category.

3 games that I'd like to play again:

Age of Empires III - I saw your review of this. After 3 plays its still my favorite game from 2007. Designer Glen Drover who worked Railroad Tycoon and Conquest of Empires with Wallace is the most Wallace-like designer out there. Of course he borrowed from Caylus and Puerto Rico so I can understand your low rating of this game.

Way out West - Older Martin Wallace game. I finally got to play this with Mike and Robert while drinking Hot Cider and Makers Mark. The game is a simpler and flawed Wallace game. But it has enough Wallace craziness to make it a lot of fun. It was fun playing with the 2 brothers.

Imperial - I liked this game but I also like multi player war-games that aren't really war-games.

I'm not sure if you'd like it. I thought it was ok:

Fire and Ice - On the negative side. There is very little player interaction and it's a little long for many people. On the good side. you get to load up a boat with Vikings and sail around Europe and Trade, Raid or Settle areas. Ameritrash people hate this game because it's not a wargame (risk like game) or an adventure game. It's still a Hybrid Eurogame.

Games Francie would like or love and you and Al can tolerate:

Thebes - The best of these type of games. The game of competitive archeology. This is a travel around the board searching and digging for stuff game. It has a Ticket to Ride, Around the World in 80 days feel. Fast pace. Plays in 60 minutes. A lot of luck involved in the game but that's OK. Nice graphics and components.

Zooloretto - I really didn't enjoy this but Z, Francie, G etc might and you might be able to tolerate it.

Crappy Games I don't think you should play:

Yspahan
Vikings
Pillers of the Earth
Norte Dame
Lenardo (thats right we played it)
Containers
Arkadia
Gheos
A number of other forgettable games

Me at WBC

World Boardgaming Championships 2007, originally uploaded by Eric E Haas.

See that slightly woman shaped black blob just left of center in the picture above. That's me at WBC. It's not a very good picture. It makes me look like a brunette. You can tell it's me by the shoes and the black lace covered box on the table. The box is actually my purse, but Malloc dubbed it the tardis. It can hold a lot of game supplies and still have room for a lipstick and beer. Also I'm not that fat. I'm wearing a coat. It was effing freezing in that room.

Insane Clown Game/Insane Clown Shoes

Today I popped into the mall to see if I might possibly find a copy of the insane clown game. The game errand was a failure, but I did find a pair of black and white stripe, peep-toe, platform wedges. Z says, "Those are sooooo cute." They are so comfortable too. I think I may wear them for Trashfest, since I expect I will have to be doing much standing.

They are good for game night too. I won't have to worry about getting my heels stuck in all the cracks and knot holes. Playing in a game store basement kind of blows.

That's what you get for playing outdoors.

My eyelids are sun burnt. It is friggin' Oct, and I get sunburned. I'm totally happy, sitting inside, trimming chits and pushing pawns, but nooooo. It is beautiful day. Let's go outside. Let's get some exercise. And what does it get me. If it isn't sunburn, it's Lyme disease. If it isn't Lyme Disease, it's poison ivy. If it isn't poison ivy, it's a broken bone. That is why I should always just stay inside and play games. None of this physical pain stuff.

Blue Moon City

Al and I each had five offerings on the Washington Monument. Whoever could get 12 crystals and get to the center first would win. Al had 11 crystals and was four spaces (two turns) from the center and two spaces (one turn) from my position. I had 12 crystals and was two spaces (one turn) from the center. It was Al's turn. He turned to me and said, "Clearly, you are 'going up' next turn. I have no choice. I must now land on you, kill you, and take a crystal. Where are the dice?"

Return of the Heroes

I just played a very frustrating game of Return of the Heroes. It was the first time that we played with the Under the Shadow of the Dragon expansion, which made the game much longer and more complicated.

The primary issue, however, was that Z decided she wasn't going to listen to anyones advice, and ended up in difficult situations that made her cranky and whiny. The first mistake she made was playing the hobbit, which is one of the new characters. The hobbit has only three hit points and only moves 2 spaces. Then she wouldn't listen to any advise about were to place her manor house, and placed it next to the White Village, where you can get healed. Therefore, she had fewer areas on the board where she could heal than the other players did. She also completely fixated on fighting the dragon to win the game. She focused on her dragon quest, and ignored doing other small quests.

Her character got killed one space away from her manor house, which resulted in major tears. We decided that since she didn't start the game with the bonus that we sometimes give her, that her bonus would be a one time "you don't lose your last life" potion. She got impatient with moving slowly, so she kept using the teleporter, which shot her everywhere on the board except where she needed to go, and ended up taking her longer to get anywhere than if she had just moved there normally. Finally she got impatient for her dragon quest chits to come out, so she spent all her gold at the mystic to pull the chits she wanted from the bag. She then didn't have the gold that she needed to actually complete one stage of her quest.

We finally ended up conceding the game to Al, which is the nice way of saying, we had to quit before we all ended up in a bad mood.

We separated out the expansion from the base game, and decided that we would just play the base game until Z gets a little older. Al also wants to try Shadow of the Dragon as a stand alone. He thinks that since it is only 9 tiles, it may play more quickly than Return of the Heroes, which would be a good thing. Although it says that it is only a two player game, Al says we should try it with three.

Game Night

Last night the mini guys were absurdly loud. As in painful. I hate having to share a space with them. Plus they hogged all the tables, including putting things covered in wet paint on one of the tables we usually use. We ended up squished around one table. Fortunately, there were only 6 of us last night.

I played Through the Desert with Francie and Todd. Todd hadn't played in a while and forgot how the game scored. As a result, he lost. I beat Francie by about 15 points. She was all like, "Well, if you hadn't squeaked out the largest purple caravan by one camel, I would have gotten it, and the game would have been closer." So what. The game is still boring.

Then 5 of us played Taj Mahal. The mini guys got extra loud at this point, so I couldn't hear all the rules. I flailed through the game by watching what the other players were doing. Taj is beyond boring. Taj makes me wish I was playing Through the Desert. Towards the end, Dave joined the table to watch and we talked about Battletech and Mechwarriors, so the night wasn't a total loss. Dave told me that the mini guy that had been screaming like a rubber ducky being axe murdered, had been getting his robot blown up, so I sort of forgive him for being so loud, but next time scream like a man! Somehow I didn't come in last in Taj, but I think that the guy who did lose was playing unusually poorly due to sleep deprivation as a result of owning an infant.

Dave got a free Q-Workshop D8 green elvish die with some magazine he picked up at the game store. He gave it to me because he prefers the red ones. So yay!

The 300

I watched this this weekend. I am supposed to be working, but I am distracted by images of Spartans marching through my head. I think I may have to get 300: The Board Game. It has pictures.

Fortress: Ameritrash

Okay, I know many people think that some of the stuff that goes on at F:AT is childish and rude, but I laughed so much yesterday that my co-workers started staring. Driving home from work, I was thinking "Assclown. What the hell is an assclown?" It made me laugh so hard I almost rear ended the car in front of me. When I got home I read Juniper's game descriptions to Al. More laughing. It is dumb shit, but a few stupid laughs improves my day.

Juniper's Game Descriptions and Other Nonsense

Your Dream Home

I got a wet bar. Cool. My friend got a formal dining room - LOSER.

Click here to Build YOUR Dream Home!

Your home is a Philanthropic Wizard's Manor Your kitchen is manned by a team of Keebler Drow Elves. There's a Chocolatessen, which is rapidly becoming your favorite room of the house. Having one is also becoming a trend among your wealthy neighbors. Your master bedroom is decorated to look like the treetop village of the Galadhrim. Your study has every fantasy novel ever written, including multiple editions of the Silmarillion and advance copies of Dungeons and Dragons Fifth Edition. One of your garages holds your collection of ferraris, and is measured in acreage. Your home also includes a roost for griffons. You've never actually seen a griffon, but you keep the roost ready anyway. Your guests enjoy your home theater with hi-def plasma screen TV, and the thrones you watch it from. Outside is the moat that protects your home from goblin invaders and extended family. And, you have a pet -- a unicorn named "Shadowhooves". Below is a snippet of the blueprints:

Build YOUR Dream Home!